Reflections of a Daughter of the Silent Generation and Mother of Generation Y
In a world with atrocity, apathy, anxiety, distraction and just plain busy-ness, I was touched by all the simple kindnesses that helped me as I helped Mom. Thanks to those simple, and often unexpected, kindnesses, the pieces of our life in Maine were starting to fall into place.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
When a coach at the Not Too Late, women over 50, basketball camp said, “you’re only as strong as your biggest weakness,” her words resonated, giving me reason to keep working on me, on the court and off.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
I was grateful for my husband and kids and our awesome caregivers who spent enough time with Mom to know her well, to let me know what they saw, and to make sure she got her meds when I stepped away.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
I was grateful, too, that these days, I could sit at Mom’s side, no words necessary, knowing she felt my love and that it was the emotionality I once felt sorry about, that fueled me now in her daily care.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
There’s plenty of literature out there about the challenge of being part of the “Sandwich Generation.” I too have sleepless nights worrying about Mom, as well as the kids. At the same time, I gotta admit, it’s pretty cool.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
I was especially grateful for the wisdom and support I received from so many places, including Mom – she may have forgotten some things due to Alzheimer’s, however there was an awful lot else she still reminded me to appreciate.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
AA’s Step Two: “Came to believe a power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity.” When offering Mom the paper birds to touch and the memory of our home in Wisconsin to connect didn’t soothe her, I took down the mobile and put it in a drawer. Sometimes, we just gotta believe someone we trust can take our worries away. (Al-Anon’s Twelve Steps & Twelve Traditions)
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
I learned long ago, in Al-Anon, that when we feel irritable or unreasonable, we need to “HALT” – it may be that we are Hungry, Angry, Lonely and/or Tired. Sometimes HALTing means putting our own feet up, sometimes it means taking a moment to learn from others who are doing just that.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
AA’s Step One: “We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives had become unmanageable.” Although I couldn’t change the course of Mom’s Alzheimer’s, I could impact the quality of her days. Hence, it was oddly reassuring when I asked her at dinner, the weather raging outside our door, “Mom, do you like where you’re living?” and she responded, “Good building, good people, what’s not to like?” (Al-Anon’s Twelve Steps & Twelve Traditions)
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
In Barbara Cooney’s Ms. Rumphius, a young girl tells her elderly aunt, “When I grow up, I too will go to faraway places, and when I grow old, I too will live beside the sea” to which her aunt responds, “There is a third thing you must do. You must do something to make the world more beautiful.”
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
