Reflections of a Daughter of the Silent Generation and Mother of Generation Y
“Do you have a plan in case of fire?” asked the fit physical therapist assigned to determine Mom’s need for in-home care. She looked him in the eye and answered definitively, “I’d put it out.”
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
I was starting to feel emotional about the changes ahead and grateful for the prospect of time together beforehand, when I noticed Mom’s intestinal bleed – a “complete curveball” my husband called it… and a classic example of the importance of “Letting Go of Expectations,” as they say in AA.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
Hospitalized again, Mom being evaluated for another intestinal ailment, with enough blood loss to warrant a transfusion, it was time to gear up again.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
AA’s Step Eight: “Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.” According to a fortune cookie, my life was about to get more interesting. It was time to move on with faith and open up to the healing ahead. (Al-Anon’s Twelve Steps & Twelve Traditions)
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
AA’s Step Seven: “Humbly asked our Higher Power to remove our shortcomings.” Faith in a Higher Power…It’s what helped me, Mom still in Maine for a bit longer, in another’s care. #thankGodforHannah! (Al-Anon’s Twelve Steps & Twelve Traditions)
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
While it complicated her care, Mom’s inability to remember the pain or other details had its advantages: she loved taking guilt-free naps with Cinnamon and regularly expressed gratitude for her good health when I tucked her in at night.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
In the many conversations we’d had regarding whether Mom wanted a DNR, this was her bottom line: “There’s no point to living if you’re not really living.” So, as I made our daily plans, in addition to the items Mom’s care required, I added time to enjoy a “calm and prolonged breakfast,” nature, and companionship.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
For as long as I could remember, exercise had relieved stress and cleared my mind. These days, Mom rebounding, I hoped it would help me get my spark back too.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
It was the first time I’d signed a consent form on Mom’s behalf. As I waited for her bone marrow biopsy, I realized I was like a seeing eye dog, only my job was to provide short-term memory. When I told Mom later that I was happy to be her memory dog, she smiled groggily and asked me where my tail was.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
