The Joy of Caring

Reflections of a Daughter of the Silent Generation and Mother of Generation Y

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#ENDALZ #gotitfrommymama Acting as if Alzheimer's Disease Believe Caregiver burden Caregiving COVID-19 Deep Vein Thrombosis Dementia Diverticulitis Eldercare Friendship Fun Gratitude Grief Health concerns Health first Hospice Care Hospitalization Infection In the Moment Keep it simple Life after death Losing a loved one Marriage Memory Loss Millennials One day at a time Parenting Pets Pet Therapy Pivoting Prednisone side effects Reframing Siblings Step 3 Step 4 Step 9 Step 11 Step 12 The Twelve Steps The Twelve Steps of AA Time Working outside the home
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Post DVT Haikus

November 9, 2017

Deep vein thrombosis, her leg all swollen and blue, and we feared a bleed.

On blood thinner now, filter protecting her lungs, home to recover.

Compression stocking, why are you so freakin’ tight? No more blood clots, right?

Noticing the bench, “I played piano on that…” she says with a smile.

“Is that Mother’s chair?” I nod at the needlepoint, “Is she still around?”

“About the baby, can we make a plan to see?” a great grandma now.

Behind her at work, the builder pounding away, making our home sound.

Ever resilient, her eyes as blue as the sea, a cat with nine lives.

Mom sits with a book, dog in lap rocking a way, a smile on my face.

Eighty-five years young, expect the unexpected, one day at a time.

—from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story

Having fun #ENDALZ, Alzheimer's Disease, Caregiving, Deep Vein Thrombosis, Gratitude, Health first, Keep it simple, One day at a time, The Twelve Steps of AA terry@thejoyofcaring.com 2 Comments

Step Eleven, I Am Not Alone

November 1, 2017

AA’s Step Eleven: “Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with our Higher Power, praying only for knowledge of our Higher Power’s will for us and the power to carry that out.” When I’m feeling anxious and need a hand to hold, I can hold my own. Then I’ll find my hands are joined in prayer, and I am not alone. (Al-Anon’s Twelve Steps & Twelve Traditions)

—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story

Practicing faith, Uncategorized Acting as if, Alzheimer's Disease, Caregiving, Eldercare, Gratitude, Keep it simple, Marriage, One day at a time, Parenting, Step 11 terry@thejoyofcaring.com Leave a Comment

Green Monster of the Midwest, aka “How time flies…”

October 17, 2017

Playing Games, then
and now

Over the past seventeen years, Mike and his wife Jen had become dear friends – neighbors first, family later. All that was left to say was a deep-felt thank you to them and all our Midwest friends. I hoped our friendships would endure.

—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story

Letting go #ENDALZ, Caregiving, Friendship, Gratitude, Keep it simple, Marriage, Parenting terry@thejoyofcaring.com Leave a Comment

Healing as We Go – UTIs and Mohs Nose, Mom and Me

October 12, 2017

FullSizeRender-1

As my spouse and I drove 1400 miles to Maine where we’d set up shop for Mom and Cinnamon to join us, I tried to be brave, to count my lucky stars, to practice my faith. Fingers crossed, in prayer and gratitude.

—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story

Making peace, Practicing faith #ENDALZ, #gotitfrommymama, Alzheimer's Disease, Caregiving, Eldercare, Keep it simple, Losing a loved one, Marriage, Millennials, Mohs procedure, Parenting, UTI, Working outside the home terry@thejoyofcaring.com Leave a Comment

Step Ten, “Progress Not Perfection”

October 5, 2017

FullSizeRender-1

AA’s Step Ten: “Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.” These days, with how Mom’s Alzheimer’s anchors her in the moment, I’m grateful for how this slogan and Step Ten help me stay right here with her. (Al-Anon’s Twelve Steps & Twelve Traditions)

—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story

Practicing faith Alzheimer's Disease, Caregiving, Friendship, Gratitude, Health first, Keep it simple, Marriage, One day at a time, Parenting, Progress not Perfection, Step 10, The Twelve Steps of AA terry@thejoyofcaring.com Leave a Comment

Empty Nest Plus One

September 12, 2017

Screen Shot 2017-09-08 at 12.29.12 PM
Mom and Doug, a couple summers back

Sunday morning, two days after we stopped the Tramadol, as she tried to make sense of the prior couple of days, Mom asked, “Who’s going to keep me from going crazy?” I was glad I could answer, “I will do my best, Mom, and Doug will help too.”

—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story

Learning as we go #ENDALZ, Alzheimer's Disease, Back Pain, Caregiving, Diverticulitis, Gratitude, Keep it simple, Marriage, Millennials, Pain relief, Parenting, Step 9, Tramadol Side Effects terry@thejoyofcaring.com 4 Comments

Fountain of Youth – hanging out with our Millennial kids and their Millennial friends

August 21, 2017

Millennial Sunrise on Snow Pond, thanks to Hannah

I knew I’d miss our Millennial kids when they went away to school; it hit me now, just how much I’d miss their Millennial friends as they set out on their next chapters too.

—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story

Having fun Alzheimer's Disease, Caregiving, Friendship, Gratitude, Keep it simple, Millennials, Parenting terry@thejoyofcaring.com 2 Comments

“Beast Mode” Time

August 9, 2017

A gift from my CrossFit trainer Nicole

Hospitalized again, Mom being evaluated for another intestinal ailment, with enough blood loss to warrant a transfusion, it was time to gear up again.

—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story

Helping others #ENDALZ, Acting as if, Alzheimer's Disease, Caregiving, Friendship, Gratitude, Health first, Keep it simple, One day at a time, Parenting terry@thejoyofcaring.com 8 Comments

Summer in Wisconsin ain’t too shabby either!

July 27, 2017

Mom on walk
Thanks to our caregiver Hannah for catching Lala and Cinnamon in action

Having fun #ENDALZ, Alzheimer's Disease, Caregiving, Gratitude, Keep it simple, One day at a time, Pets terry@thejoyofcaring.com 2 Comments

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I am Acadia Manset's granddaughter. Raised in Maine, graduated from Dartmouth College and Harvard Law, I have spent the last 24 years parenting. With our adult kids in the process of leaving the nest, my mom has moved in, leading to precious time and daily opportunities I never anticipated. I hope that this site will inspire insight and growth, humor and fun, questions and answers, for you and for me.

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Raised in Maine, I had spent the prior 24 years parenting, mostly in Wisconsin. With our adult kids in the process of leaving the nest, my mom moved in, from Maine, leading to precious time and daily opportunities I had never anticipated. I launched this site in 2017 as a way to share that experience, hoping to pass along what I was learning about Alzheimer's disease, to process the challenging parts, and to have some fun too. I never anticipated the way the community of readers would fuel me in staying the course. Today, I am deeply grateful for that, and so much more.

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