Reflections of a Daughter of the Silent Generation and Mother of Generation Y
In Barbara Cooney’s Ms. Rumphius, a young girl tells her elderly aunt, “When I grow up, I too will go to faraway places, and when I grow old, I too will live beside the sea” to which her aunt responds, “There is a third thing you must do. You must do something to make the world more beautiful.”
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
The wonder of it is, finding and using a more loving language is something we can all do, here and now, to make the world more beautiful.
In response to the carpenter’s “this place is jinxed,” I chose Paradiso blue for the upstairs floor. Thank God for humor, animals, friendship and faith for keeping me on track; those, and Mom, who was not one bit superstitious and who knew paradise when she saw it, even with one eye.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
AA’s Step Twelve: “Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.” This meant being present in the moment, right here, right now, maybe not all of the time, however, more and more of the time. (Al-Anon’s Twelve Steps & Twelve Traditions)
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
As my concern for Berry the Beagle grew, my childhood friend Kathy dropped in, offering to hang with Mom while I took Berry to the animal hospital. A couple days later I met my childhood friend Nancy at the mall. We laughed so hard the back of my head throbbed. I needed to work on whatever those muscles were. I had a feeling I’d need ’em.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
I’ve been called many things by those who are supposed to know me best:
“hypersensitive”, “too emotional”, even “nuts.”
Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever get to a place where their words don’t cause me pain.
Probably not…that’s one of the costs of being:
“hypersensitive”, “too emotional”, even “nuts.”
Here are some things I’ve realized, moving back to where I’m from:
The more things change, the more they stay the same.
I don’t need to be loved by everybody, just by some.
I can choose those who accept sensitivity, emotionality and even nuttiness.
I can live with the anger I feel at expectations unmet,
the fear I feel at being judged, and the sadness I feel at being rejected.
I can take care of me, even when it’s difficult –
exercise, hydration, nutrition, sleep, writing, friendship, animals, family, faith –
The healing these bring is within reach.
This is the way to take care of me, not believing what I am told when I am not who others want me to be.
“Hypersensitive”, “too emotional”, even “nuts” – yes!
With these three things, I’ve been blessed.
—from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
AA’s Step Eleven: “Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with our Higher Power, praying only for knowledge of our Higher Power’s will for us and the power to carry that out.” When I’m feeling anxious and need a hand to hold, I can hold my own. Then I’ll find my hands are joined in prayer, and I am not alone. (Al-Anon’s Twelve Steps & Twelve Traditions)
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
Over the past seventeen years, Mike and his wife Jen had become dear friends – neighbors first, family later. All that was left to say was a deep-felt thank you to them and all our Midwest friends. I hoped our friendships would endure.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
As my spouse and I drove 1400 miles to Maine where we’d set up shop for Mom and Cinnamon to join us, I tried to be brave, to count my lucky stars, to practice my faith. Fingers crossed, in prayer and gratitude.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
Getting Mom back to Maine among family and friends, the ocean near, was my own bucket list odyssey. My counselor said, “Some dreams do come true.” I hoped she was right.
—excerpt from Living Is for Living: A Caregiver’s Story
